When to Reveal Your Medical History

Our first question comes to us from Nicole who actually, is in our audience. So, Nicole, welcome, you look so lovely. Thank you, thank you for having me. What would you like to ask the doctors? So, when people initially look at me they think that I had a breast augmentation, when in reality I was diagnosed with breast cancer at age 26 last year. And so, I had a double mastectomy, during my recovery I got an infection which was a huge setback. After five surgeries in a year it’s inevitable for me to look like a chopping board underneath my clothes, as normal as I may look on the outside. And I’m fairly open about sharing my story with people but my question is, how soon is too soon to share when it comes to dating? Nicole, what’s so incredible about you is that, here you are, look at you. Not only are you a survivor but you’re here and I think for all of us it doesn’t matter, you know, my brother had a massive stroke when he was 10. All of us have something, right? Right. For one person it’s breast cancer. For another person it’s a stroke. For another person it’s an emotional issue, and we all have to find that sweet spot between disclosing everything on the first date. We all know those people who like vomit on the first date. Like my whole life– That’s me though, that is me, I tell right away. And then, it’s finding that sweet spot, maybe it’s the second date, or the third date. If you find somebody who you’re like, “Wow, this is somebody that I could have a real emotional relationship with,” then you tell them. I want to ask you a question. Okay. Why do you hope somebody is going to fall in love with you? What is your best, favorite quality about yourself? I’m honest, I’m open, I’m realistic and positive. I find a silver lining in every situation, even with my breast cancer story last year. What could have been my most tragic year ended up being my best year, and–. (applause) When you just talked, I got chills up and down my spine, and now I’m tearing up. Oh my God, I’ll give you a hug after, don’t worry. (laughter and applause) When you go on that date, you’re going to find that time, and that moment, somebody’s going to fall in love with you for that. Right. And listen, that surgery, and if you have an amazing surgeon like Dr. Ordon or whoever your surgeon was, it’s going to be back burner, and you’re stronger for it. Exactly. You’re beautiful, inside and out. Thank you, thank you. (applause) You know, Nicole, as a plastic and reconstructive surgeon, it’s a large part of what I do in my practice, dealing with women like yourself, but you’ve been through a lot. A double mastectomy is big time surgery, and then doing the reconstruction is also a big process. You’ve been through something that very few women go through at your age, and you have a feeling that my body is not the same, and although we can do wonderful reconstructive surgery, it’s never going to be exactly like you were before. The scars will always be there.

3 thoughts on “When to Reveal Your Medical History

  1. I would like to share my story, we need to address the issues that are the best interest to all people in this time of sickness and the silence behind it.

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