I Am Always Late For Mass


– I’m here to make a confession, despite all of my good efforts, all of my years of practice, all of my good intentions I am
chronically late for Mass. I am not saying this is a good thing. I’m ashamed of this. Whether I start getting ready for Mass 10 minutes before I’m supposed to leave or an hour and 10 minutes
before I’m supposed to leave. I don’t know, there’s like a fold in the time-space continuum. Just try to put yourself in my position. Okay, so I’m late to Mass, I am driving, parking lot’s full so I pull in and then I’m like running through the parking lot,
I’m starting to perspire. I open the door, I go in and everyone is sitting in the back seven pews at the end of the pew. I don’t know if it’s other late people who are just earlier than I was or if it’s the early Mass goers who are playing a big fat joke on me. What usually happens is the
person sitting on the end decides to hold down their
fort, hold down their position for whatever reason, I’m not sure, and they like do the turn, like you know, the awkward knee turn. And so then you, as the offending party, have to decide which way
you’re going to go in. So you’re gonna like,
kinda like crawl over them, are you gonna face them are you gonna like face the other way? It’s awkward either way. I don’t think it fosters the greatest amount of fraternal feeling. So what I’m proposing is a shift in our thinking as a church. I’m gonna use a nice ‘I’ statement to not make it sound
aggressive or accusatory. If I ever go to Mass and
I am on time or early or even remotely not embarrassingly late I’ll walk forward and I
will go into the middle. And if someone that arrives
late and just slides into the pew I will not look at them, I will not make eye
contact because I don’t want them to think I’m judging them. But I will smile. I will smile in my heart,
in my soul I will smile and I will say, you’re welcome. I’m guessing either you
really relate to this video or you are kind of resenting me right now and thinking I should
just get to Mass early. And you know what? You’re right. See you at Mass. I’ll probably be climbing over you.

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